tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61255509183869346742024-03-06T12:00:53.621+08:00A Bucket of GraceAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04628831243283062328noreply@blogger.comBlogger119125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-32488409920861764942023-05-02T20:05:00.005+08:002023-05-02T20:05:52.643+08:00Core Memories: Esep-esep ring<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS6Am_EF3s962DUEDy8Bg9qjFTdqevlyxDXMJE_fe-jIS_FrwvNYqBjSEOQBXU3qjSnAvVDRNNCROzG6yGOXOHC23sUI5tnxmiETp3iWbEuLmZ85hELGz0Tv1jdg1YVZ2NKKMvfRcmApAmYlzexc8BASbpHh2hRs5S4gXxqCpTolwoFFg5c5-e6w/s960/aine%20abcs.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="665" data-original-width="960" height="445" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS6Am_EF3s962DUEDy8Bg9qjFTdqevlyxDXMJE_fe-jIS_FrwvNYqBjSEOQBXU3qjSnAvVDRNNCROzG6yGOXOHC23sUI5tnxmiETp3iWbEuLmZ85hELGz0Tv1jdg1YVZ2NKKMvfRcmApAmYlzexc8BASbpHh2hRs5S4gXxqCpTolwoFFg5c5-e6w/w640-h445/aine%20abcs.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>Me (center), wearing a red malong. To my right is Poyen, wearing a pink and red baro't saya</i>.</span></div><p><br /></p><p>I am four years old and in kindergarten (ABCs level). Ma'am Lilibeth, our supervisor, is ending our class at 12 noon, so she gathers and calls for us to close the day with a prayer. I don't remember who is leading the prayer, but I remember folding my hands, glancing at Johan, a little boy I have a huge crush on. You know what they say: girls tend to mature a little faster than boys. He once peed in class while we were saying our closing prayer, but I didn't mind.</p><p>"I raise my hands," Ma'am Lilibeth begins.</p><p>"And close like this," we all chime in, "and bow our heads and close our eyes and pray."</p><p>We all squeeze our eyes shut but I feel my large plastic ring slip from my finger. It's a magenta plastic frog ring that came from a one-peso Esep-esep snack, a flavorless corn puff snack that I only buy for the little trinkets inside. I hear the light plastic hit the floor. I keep my eyes shut, hearing only the excited shuffling of feet beside me, and the rest of the class mumbling Ma'am Lilibeth's prayer.</p><p>"Amen," we all say together, and I pry my eyes open, starting to look around the floor for signs of my ring. Johan gives me a nudge, holding out my ring—like a proposal, I think. </p><p><br /></p><p>I replay that moment in my head over and over again, like hard candy in my mouth, as my dad and I walk home from school. Tomorrow, we can walk to school together, I excitedly think, knowing my dad and I usually pass by their apartment in the morning. I give the ring a little twist on my finger, sealing my daydream, like it were a plan.</p><p>Johan's dad and my dad would chat, walking their bikes through the narrow creekside, as Johan and I lead the way, passing through the creek bridges, and counting the pink snail eggs sticking to the sides of the creek walls.</p><p><br /></p><p>At school, Johan usually treats me like a stranger, running around, playing shark with the rest of the boys, climbing up the slide, and roaring as if sharks make a sound underwater. Why boys do that, I do not know.</p><p><br /></p><p>"Who do you like more," I hear a classmate tease Johan inside the empty church hall where we usually gather when we don't have classes. "Poyen or Aine?"</p><p>I hear my name and shoot them a look, half-expecting Johan to say my name. Didn't he pick up my ring from the floor? It must be me, I think.</p><p>"Poyen," he says, shaking his head as if the question is ridiculous.</p><p>The bell rings, and I blink back hot tears, watching the rest of our classmates exit the hall.</p><p><br /></p><p>Of course he'd pick Poyen, my best friend with long, shiny, jet black hair that falls down to her waist. My short and wavy hair bouncing on my shoulders could never compare. I look down at my plastic ring and pull it from my finger. I feel a lump in my throat as I admire the ring, wondering why he picked it up from the floor when he didn't like me anyway.</p><p><i>Of course he'd choose Poyen.</i></p><p>Once, when Johan was annoyed with us, he told me to leave him alone or he'd turn me into a frog. When Poyen came, he said he was going to turn her into a princess.</p><p><br /></p><p>I watch the last student leave before I throw the ring across the hall like they do in the movies when the girl tries to forget the boy she likes. The plastic ring makes an unimpressive, silent landing on the red, polished concrete flooring.</p><p><i>Not far enough</i>, I think.</p><p>I skip to the ring, pick it up, and throw it again as far as I can, tears finally rolling down my cheeks.</p><p><br /></p><p><span style="color: #800180;">A/N: </span><span style="color: #800180;">This memory is so funny to me, but t</span><span style="color: #800180;">hanks for reading one of my many core memories! As I explained in my previous entry, I'm trying to write down memories before I forget them—I don't want to grow old and only have a few stories left to retell. </span></p><p><br /></p>Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-14190203706301976172022-02-16T17:11:00.001+08:002022-02-16T17:11:13.845+08:00Core Memories: Tomato Dance on my 3rd Birthday 🍅<p><br /></p><p><b>Have you ever wondered if you'll be able to remember today when you turn eighty?</b></p><p>It still bothers me that I've had and will have good and bad days that will weigh on me—transform me—and I wouldn't even remember anything about them in a couple of years. Sometimes I wish I didn't lose my diaries so at least there's something to read when I get a little bit older. On the other hand, I like that I can at least always retell random stories about my childhood to my husband so I won't forget them.</p><p>I read once that when you barely remember anything from your childhood, it's probably because of the trauma. I must have had a wonderful childhood then, because I remember so many things.</p><p><i>At least for now.</i></p><p>I'm actually worried I'd end up forgetting them in a few decades and just manage to tell 3 or 5 stories to my grandchildren when they ask.</p><p>Can you imagine that?</p><p>A whole life lived, and only 5 stories to tell at the end of it all.</p><p><br /></p><p>So, while I may not be able to write an entire autobiography of my <i>oh-so-ordinary</i> life, I could write a series of blog posts like this and call them <b><u>Core Memories</u></b>. Perhaps when I grow old and there's nothing left for me to do, I can come back to this series and remember that I have lived a beautiful life after all.</p><p><br /></p><h3 style="text-align: center;"><b>Core Memories: Tomato Dance on my 3rd Birthday 🍅</b></h3><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgTR2fXJobqPwZ3G22JdAUp-qoHk9zbAxq7jyAutmF61KQXZA32kh1STw6oE8p0x51FdW-AS-8SKVrif5TyRl8gpXKctfElp_Vuuc_9ZtwarHwRuLMHDvrI1rVrmFn7CbwUltiT1Uults6SgjBaQ7c3wM1OsdtCGd6SSf4Vj9827NGVTklsYlNVUQ=s2048" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgTR2fXJobqPwZ3G22JdAUp-qoHk9zbAxq7jyAutmF61KQXZA32kh1STw6oE8p0x51FdW-AS-8SKVrif5TyRl8gpXKctfElp_Vuuc_9ZtwarHwRuLMHDvrI1rVrmFn7CbwUltiT1Uults6SgjBaQ7c3wM1OsdtCGd6SSf4Vj9827NGVTklsYlNVUQ=w640-h480" width="640" /></a></div><br /></div><p><i>January 12, 1998</i></p><p>It's my third birthday.</p><p>Daddy, who dislikes big parties, is still in South Korea so my mom takes the chance to throw me a big birthday party while he isn't around. (<i>You know</i>, with the guests, balloons, a big cake, and hotdogs and marshmallows on bamboo skewers.)</p><p>I'm wearing a new denim dress and black gladiator sandals. I remember this only because we have a photo back home to prove it. My black curls bounce on my shoulders, and I don't remember minding that it isn't straight like my other friends'. </p><p>On normal days, I only play with two friends: <i>Ate </i>Minmin, who I guess is only 3 years older than me, and that other boy who made fun of me when he saw I didn't wipe after I went in their bathroom to pee. Today, I see so many more kids. Some of them I kind of know, and some I do not. So I sit in the corner and look at them play with my toys.</p><p>In the middle of the living room I spot a little kid about my age playing with my new telephone toy. I don't remember being a selfish brat, but I go to the kid and pull my toy away because it's new.</p><p>My mom must've noticed because she comes over and tells me to <i>share</i>.</p><p>Reluctantly, I let go and the kid, unfazed, happily takes my toy again and I end up playing with my other toys, stealing glances at the kid and my telephone in case they break it.</p><p>***</p><p>I'm not exactly sure who the little boy is and why the adults are pairing me up with him, so I could only guess now that I must have had not found a partner for the tomato dance. Didn't I say I only have two other regular friends? Maybe I'm the odd one out. Maybe nobody picked me. But of course it's my birthday, so they look around for another kid I can tomato dance with. Eventually, they bring a boy inside the circle. He's probably four inches taller than me so he bends his neck a little when the music starts so our foreheads meet.</p><p>The adults place a tomato between us and they clap and cheer as all the kids "dance" to the music, moving and taking small side steps so the tomatoes don't fall to the ground.</p><p>I know I'm only three but I suddenly get shy and feel my cheeks grow hot when I look up and see that our faces are only three inches apart. Ten seconds into the song, my tummy feels funny and I drop the tomato intentionally so I could peel myself away from my partner.</p><p>The adults think it was an accident, while my partner frowns, probably just concerned about the prize.</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><i>*Photo above is from 1999 or 2000, I think. I don't have the photo from my actual 3rd birthday with me so I'll just edit the post when I find it.</i></div><p><br /></p>Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-82759363039279144032021-03-29T11:06:00.003+08:002021-03-29T11:15:10.495+08:00Romanticizing the past and daydreaming about the future ☁️<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKyx7ONbNcJlDeGTnz0xkXEb16EHK9e05X3H-z7pHwF2X9hRqEu9i4Vpos23jJznvhE09I1NXXDxTQMYAn17wfLUa-0q8dANjBKaKyZ09AXOjmzF6uLMiLVRV8kBjWdUtm3Bep1bBiRA/s2048/kelly-sikkema-jIrsEPB4_iU-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1365" data-original-width="2048" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKyx7ONbNcJlDeGTnz0xkXEb16EHK9e05X3H-z7pHwF2X9hRqEu9i4Vpos23jJznvhE09I1NXXDxTQMYAn17wfLUa-0q8dANjBKaKyZ09AXOjmzF6uLMiLVRV8kBjWdUtm3Bep1bBiRA/w640-h426/kelly-sikkema-jIrsEPB4_iU-unsplash.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br />Ever since my last post, I've been battling against my feelings of yearning for the past — <i>the good old days</i>, as I'd like to call them sometimes<i>.</i><p></p><p><br /></p><p>Of course, I am in a different stage in my life right now. I am a different person and I now have different hopes and concerns. A different set of friends and family, for sure. And yet, I still find myself looking back, as if the present is not good enough for me. <b>But it is.</b> It truly is. And it's even more than what I had hoped for. I know this could come off as being ungrateful, but no matter how hard I try, a part of me misses what used to be when my family was still complete and I still had all my friends.</p><p>It's funny, isn't it?</p><p><b><span style="color: #800180;">Sometimes we over-romanticize the past and daydream about the future, not realizing that the present is just as good.</span></b> That if we don't pay attention to it, it will be just another memory of the past that we would wish we could come back to.</p><p>How do I even shed this off when so much of my identity is anchored on the past?</p><p><i>What do I do so I don't lose sight of the present where God is too?</i></p><p><br /></p><p><i>P.S. I tried deleting all my social media apps (although I still go to Facebook on my computer to check on messages), to test if it could cure my regrets and insecurities. So far I feel nothing but this nagging desire to share a photo I took earlier. I don't know how long these whirlwind of emotions will last, to be honest.</i></p><p><br /></p>Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-4481463778642058412021-03-16T09:34:00.005+08:002021-03-16T09:35:20.717+08:00I forgot God is in the present too<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div></div><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyW4aoaIJpHn64OcMoNoQgGiD9CGboMgiOu19rSehPus8DjdLhMoyWv7Hs9lJPz8IO5DXhg4XdoZ07FPI6JNhcgeSc_BPt4LIoic8wq0zbzi6J6YRg89t7sXm5rBHOLaGKK8CBWuj-OQ/s2048/tony-eight-media-iy34kwDyJ4E-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1150" data-original-width="2048" height="359" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyW4aoaIJpHn64OcMoNoQgGiD9CGboMgiOu19rSehPus8DjdLhMoyWv7Hs9lJPz8IO5DXhg4XdoZ07FPI6JNhcgeSc_BPt4LIoic8wq0zbzi6J6YRg89t7sXm5rBHOLaGKK8CBWuj-OQ/w640-h359/tony-eight-media-iy34kwDyJ4E-unsplash.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div></div><br />Being in the faith for over 20 years sure gives you feelings of staleness.<div><br /></div><div>Dry, old, unappetizing. <div><br /></div><div>I always find myself looking back at the old days, wishing I could turn back time so I could perhaps, do things differently. Even if I couldn't change things, I could just, at least, relive those times. Back when I was younger and more zealous about my belief in Christ. Back when I felt so <i>innocent</i>.<p style="text-align: left;">"The glory days," I always tell myself.</p><p style="text-align: left;">But today the Holy Spirit reminded me that while I was looking back, reminiscing my past, or even on days when I was daydreaming about the future, I have overlooked my God who is in the present. I forgot that He is also working in me in the present just as He has done for me in the past.</p><p style="text-align: left;">He is present even on days when I forget.</p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p></div></div>Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-67925114742973985282021-02-26T13:10:00.007+08:002021-02-26T13:29:12.504+08:00I didn't have a Facebook account until my senior year in college<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizYbhXjXeqeSOzL2Zuy12LBRLQvjQqKJJrjfdt1K0_oAEKeahgn4lxRNphrE8CzF8N_OLU_I18AEPBYJclXEp-tPXGv0TkC0EGLatim77fuWViprafiTTXKlXjKbSwOjH3qo9wzkMoAA/s2048/priscilla-du-preez-BjhUu6BpUZA-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1365" data-original-width="2048" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizYbhXjXeqeSOzL2Zuy12LBRLQvjQqKJJrjfdt1K0_oAEKeahgn4lxRNphrE8CzF8N_OLU_I18AEPBYJclXEp-tPXGv0TkC0EGLatim77fuWViprafiTTXKlXjKbSwOjH3qo9wzkMoAA/w640-h426/priscilla-du-preez-BjhUu6BpUZA-unsplash.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Most people would be surprised every time I tell them I wasn't allowed to have a Facebook account until I turned 18. And even <i>after</i> I turned 18, I wasn't allowed to post anytime I wanted. Back then, Facebook shows your friends what post you liked or commented in, so my dad would <i>always</i> <i>know </i>what I've been up to online if he checked! I didn't understand at the time but my dad told me Facebook was bad for me. Of course I didn't believe him then. If I hadn't told him our professor was posting our assignments on our Facebook group, he wouldn't even have allowed me to open an account! It was 2013 and everyone I know was pretty much on the platform.</div><p>I resented him for a while then. But looking back, I realized I probably wouldn't have started this blog had I been on Facebook when everyone else was there. I started my [first] YouTube channel too, having nothing else to do with the internet, our DSLR camera, and our family laptop. </p><p>It's not that I'm ungrateful for the convenience of social media today, but recently I've been struggling with focus and creativity. I couldn't even count how many times I've found myself scrolling through Facebook, Twitter, and TikTok — hopping from one app to another — until I realize I still have tons of work to do. And despite the dopamine they say you get from the apps, I <i>always </i>feel groggy as soon as I look up from my screen.</p><p>But do I ever stop?</p><p>You're right.</p><p>I don't.</p><p><br /></p><p>So last night I uninstalled TikTok — the number one culprit. It's crazy how I learn so much and laugh so much from 15-second videos, but my attention span was plummeting. Suddenly, I couldn't even work without stopping every 5 minutes to check on my phone. I couldn't even watch a YouTube video without getting distracted by the recommended videos at the sidebar.</p><p>I watched a video the other day on focus and the guy (see, I don't even remember who he was) explained that the problem today isn't too much information, but information management. Again, I mostly forgot what he said because I might have clicked out 3 minutes into the video, but I remember him recommending we take a step back from these sites or platforms that feed us too much information. It was not a new suggestion, but it was a reminder that I need to create more space in my head for creativity and peace. That I need to be more intentional about it.</p><p><br /></p><p>Removing an app like TikTok from my phone doesn't seem like much, but many who've tried say it worked wonders for their productivity and work patterns. Perhaps next week I'd have the strength to remove another app until I can do all the things I used to do when my daily life didn't revolve around my phone. Sometimes it's better to peel off an old band-aid slowly. </p><p>Until then, however, I'd have to deal with this quiet urge to reinstall the app back.</p><p><br /></p>Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-7534137918220566482021-02-26T01:11:00.004+08:002021-02-26T01:35:16.766+08:00The Long-Overdue Chapter: Chapter 26<p>I've been thinking about creating a new website — like a separate website for my creative pursuits. Sure, I have a business website (where I carry my husband's surname) which I haven't officially shared to the public yet, but I'm not sure if I can indulge in my attempts at creative writing without getting a separate writer's website. If that's the case, I might use my maiden name. Will that even make sense?</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiICYHxDIBI2NuiHtxrsbQ5CqCIEsEPBGSm-tv_tAWwE4LleHtmSYe_3AICjLQ5Fekq4Sn_aHRP8P7UDicyRteihccPv9zb7O0gxcmfroKucGg6gzUtKeWoorRvAUfFov3yrSaaghCklA/s2048/79091520_2821304874568371_4896756003023880192_o.JPEG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1463" data-original-width="2048" height="458" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiICYHxDIBI2NuiHtxrsbQ5CqCIEsEPBGSm-tv_tAWwE4LleHtmSYe_3AICjLQ5Fekq4Sn_aHRP8P7UDicyRteihccPv9zb7O0gxcmfroKucGg6gzUtKeWoorRvAUfFov3yrSaaghCklA/w640-h458/79091520_2821304874568371_4896756003023880192_o.JPEG" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">It's been almost 2 years since my last entry and that didn't even count as a proper blog post.</div><p>So now I'm here, trying to pry open a dusty box full of memories of the old me.</p><p>Of course I'm still me. You know. Just married — and with a personality I think I can finally understand. 26 years on earth and I feel like I'm starting to know myself more. Kevin (my husband) and I just moved into our own home 2 months ago (a year after our wedding) and without anyone to tell us what to do, and when and how to do things, I finally see who I am as a person and what I think I'm here for, I guess.</p><p>Of course I'm bound to change a little bit more once Kevin and I have kids, but while we're in this phase — exploring our individualities, together — we're seeing ourselves in a different light. And that, I think, is refreshing. I didn't know that I actually like the colors yellow and orange. That I could actually love milk. That I enjoy cooking, or that I dislike a noisy home. It's like getting to know myself for the first time.</p><p>When my dad passed away last July, I became even more me — more sober — realizing I was like my father after all. Like someone grabbing me by the shoulders, I felt that jolt of reality and I saw myself absorbing everything we used to do together. I enter my home office every day, looking at all my stuff — the library, camera station, and the wide desk like he used to have — and see bits and pieces of him and my childhood. Sometimes it makes me smile, sometimes it makes me cry.</p><p>Now, I'm even more sure of what I want to do in the next 50 years. It still sounds a little crazy but I draw comfort from the thought that my dad would have been excited for me.</p><p>Maybe this is what they mean by becoming an adult. Being more confident about yourself. But since I still feel like I'm 19, I can never tell for sure. Am I an adult because of the things that I do, or because of how I feel about things?</p><p><i><br /></i></p><p><i>26 years on earth and I'm just seeing myself growing.</i></p><p>I still have so many things to learn but I've never been so excited in my life.</p><p><br /></p><p>To my dad,</p><p>I'll try to do the things I said I'd do.</p><p>For you.</p><p>For us.</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-59032953679550313682019-07-22T13:23:00.001+08:002019-07-22T13:23:43.963+08:00[SERMON NOTES] Jesus Is Most Valuable: Be Established in Him<div>
<br /></div>
Resetting this blog to its original purpose. Finally. This is the start of a series called <i>Sermon Notes</i>, where I summarize our Sunday sermons at church. Originally, these articles supposedly just go to our Sunday bulletin/newsletter, but I'm adding them here for a wider reach.<div>
<br /><div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>JESUS IS MOST VALUABLE: BE ESTABLISHED IN HIM </b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
(<i>Ptr. Jake Fuentes, July 14, 2019</i>)</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjv4xUVbrNSd1qBASC-LM9GOiJLQAmlbX-MAWJtQ5AqNMP4Nhx4L3t0WvkndfuCvDhesbACTxl7h_Rm_csYFFTiYbCbG-KBWYMOZgN_mWQjBAS74s_Nb4AMc4C5KR-J56ZFibrH0jZcIw/s1600/67377811_689079918223361_3436319873725104128_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="778" data-original-width="1600" height="311" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjv4xUVbrNSd1qBASC-LM9GOiJLQAmlbX-MAWJtQ5AqNMP4Nhx4L3t0WvkndfuCvDhesbACTxl7h_Rm_csYFFTiYbCbG-KBWYMOZgN_mWQjBAS74s_Nb4AMc4C5KR-J56ZFibrH0jZcIw/s640/67377811_689079918223361_3436319873725104128_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /><div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
We are living in a world where concern for what is pure and true is rare. While many people rejoice on sin and their carnal passions, the Bible says that there is nothing pleasing about this. Proverbs 14:34 says, “<i><span style="color: #990000;">Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin is a reproach to any people.</span></i>” <br /><br />In an age where society’s moral compass has gone awry, how do we, Christians, cope? How do we reclaim our godly values and keep them as our family’s foundation? <br /><br /> <br /><br />The Bible teaches us that we need to be established in Jesus. To do this, we need to… <br /><br /><b>1. KNOW JESUS </b><br /><br />We start reclaiming our values by understanding who is the most valuable of all: <b>JESUS CHRIST</b>. The Bible teaches us that Jesus is not an ordinary teacher. He is not just another charismatic leader either. <b>He is God in the flesh</b> (Philippians 2:9-11). By understanding that Jesus is exalted above all names on heaven and on earth, we understand that we are founded on The Greatest One of all – the Solid Rock that cannot be shaken. <br /><br /><b>2. BELIEVE IN JESUS CHRIST </b><br /><br />Establishing ourselves in Him goes beyond just knowing who Christ is. We have to believe in what He has done on the cross for us and we have to believe that eternal life is received through Him alone. John 14:6 says, “<i><span style="color: #990000;">Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.</span></i>’” <br /><br /><b>3. DO THE WILL OF GOD </b><br /><br />Above all, establishing oneself in Jesus Christ does not just end in the mind. <b>It should translate into action.</b> As we declare Jesus to be our master and absolute authority, we do so through repentance – “a change of mind and a change of direction.” This means letting go of the old sinful ways and being transformed into Christlikeness. We have to remember that being established in Jesus Christ is not just knowing or believing that He is the way to eternal life. It is also expressing this belief through our lives and following hard after God and His will. Calling Jesus “Lord” does not cut it (Matthew 7:21). <br /><br /> <br /><br />Jesus said in Matthew 7:34, “<i><span style="color: #990000;">Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock.</span></i>” The world may be filled with all sorts of ungodly passions and different versions of so-called “truths,” but just as Jesus Christ – the most valuable of all – will not be shaken, so will those who establish themselves in Him be.</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-27647132885218859852018-06-26T18:17:00.001+08:002018-06-26T18:17:30.820+08:00The Story, So Far2017 was probably the year I wrote the least. One, because I've been terribly busy, and two, because the things that kept me busy were changes that I have no idea how to share with you. I have detached myself from people - ended relationships and started new ones. From borderline extrovert, I have curled into a different type of introvert, shying myself away from people and refusing engagements. (Can you believe I've shifted from ENFP-T to INFP-T?) Sometimes I feel I have spiraled down in the social world, but there are also times I feel stronger and braver. I actually do not know which part of my head to believe. Was I broken? Was I actually stronger like I wanted myself to believe?<br />
<br />
I'm still anticipating changes in the next few months. While they make me anxious, they also definitely make me feel older - more in control of my actions. I just turned 23 and I could not fathom how, years ago, I always said I could not wait for my 24th year when I'd have my life all to myself. Wrong assumption, definitely. Now, I would give anything to slow down time. I guess when you're getting older, time flies even faster, taunting you as if you were in a race you're bound to lose anyway. Remember when you were younger and you had to fake your afternoon naps just so you could go out and play with your friends? Five minutes of lying still on the bed and it seems like forever. Meanwhile, here you are having approximately eight hours of sleep and it's still not enough. Time is a tease, and I keep on thinking how five years from now, I'd probably still be feeling nostalgic over my 23rd year. In other words, life's crazy. Don't be surprised.<br />
<br />
Funny how I complain about time being so fast and yet wishing for it to go even faster anyway. Kevin has always reminded me to quit overthinking and just try to live in the moment - try to take whatever peace life is offering me - but I always go back to this wheel of thought like a crazy hamster.<br />
<br />
But, I know I'm coping. <b>Thank God I am.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Here's a list of what you've probably missed </b>(or, IDK, you probably don't care but I'm writing them down anyway):<br />
<br />
1. I gained <i>so much</i> weight over the year, you won't believe the numbers on the scale, but I'm kinda shedding them off now <span style="font-size: x-small;">(or at least I'm trying to!)</span>.<br />
<br />
2. I have a cool writing job!<br />
<br />
3. I moved to a new home a few months ago! It was a pain to go through the process of renovations and home-furnishing but it definitely made me feel more in control of adulthood. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(I guess nobody ever gets to this "phase" but I want to pretend.) </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
4. With the bigger, more peaceful space, I can finally move forward to more intentional writing and filming. I guess I no longer have a reason to delay my passion project, as well. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(I am reviewing this draft a few months later - I wrote this last April - and no, I still haven't produced a decent film/article, but I will, soon!)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
5. Aaand, last on this list: <i>God gave me Kevin</i>. I'm not sure if you've noticed but the posts before this were when we just started dating. Crazy how one year could change things <i>so much</i>, huh?<br />
<br />
<br />
<i>And, blah, blah, blah. </i>This, is the story, so far. I just wanted to write down the burden of the previous year so I'd have a blank slate for 2018, although I know waiting until half of the year has passed before publishing a new year's post is ridiculous. I do promise to write as often as I can now though so please don't give up on me just yet!<br />
<br />
<br />
Love you peoples,<br />
<br />
AineKatherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-76610656823628736372017-10-05T09:23:00.000+08:002019-03-19T17:22:41.602+08:00Operation Adult: Ep. 2I'm coming back with another blog post on my life so far. In comparison to my previous update, my workload had quadrupled and I am left with little to no free time now. I always catch myself wishing for a break. But, here I am, writing a random blog post in between the three papers that are due today despite my "day off". I needed to get away for a moment - a little breather to keep my mind off the pressure I've been placing on myself.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAad2hWcnHktKzsnRsWHXxK0F99iIKCb91UppbAtxmva7-p2Um8WKmSBnzKxDIiBKAnAHiFL-hwKQgeD9_qEk6ZOLrVl2Yvo92dtzY9pnNqaN0H4gZwIsQMLIpQ-zebHzck8cp-Rg7xw/s1600/1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="852" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAad2hWcnHktKzsnRsWHXxK0F99iIKCb91UppbAtxmva7-p2Um8WKmSBnzKxDIiBKAnAHiFL-hwKQgeD9_qEk6ZOLrVl2Yvo92dtzY9pnNqaN0H4gZwIsQMLIpQ-zebHzck8cp-Rg7xw/s640/1.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<b>Dear you,</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><i>You're doing fine.</i> </b>You know you're wearing yourself out but do not forget who this is for. Remember your mom and dad. You love them, and you're doing this for them. Remember that. You're still a young thing, wandering about with little direction but look how far you've gone. You may not seem to enjoy the same luxuries your friends are posting on social media, but that doesn't mean they're living a better life. We all have struggles we do not want to share. They have burdens to carry and so do you.<br />
<br />
<b><i>You're doing okay.</i></b> You may not have built a house for yourself yet or gotten yourself your dream car, but that doesn't mean you're a failure. You might not have gone to your dream places, but that doesn't mean you're not doing things right. Having a picture taken in Paris or the most exotic destinations cannot be your standard for success.<br />
<i><br /></i>
<b><i>It's okay to cry sometimes. </i></b>When you feel like a hamster running on the wheel, do not hesitate to pause and cry. Sometimes we have to admit that strong people cry too. Even God's closest friends cry. You do not have to carry your burden alone. You do not have to keep it all in.<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>You'll be better.</b> </i>You may feel tired now, you may feel your eyes burn from staring at the computer screen for twelve hours straight but that does not indicate a pathetic life. The dread you feel over the pile of work to be done is not something that lasts forever.<br />
<br />
You might have little left for yourself at the end of the day but that doesn't mean it's always going to be that way. You'll reach the end of the tunnel soon enough. You're doing well. It's going to be alright. There's always something to look forward to each day. And even if this little bright star is hidden behind the heavy evening clouds, it's always bound to show up.<b> <i>Always. </i></b><br />
<br />
<br />Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-47258935872151521412017-07-06T00:30:00.003+08:002017-07-06T00:33:34.602+08:00The In-betweens<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:DoNotShowRevisions/>
<w:DoNotPrintRevisions/>
<w:DoNotShowMarkup/>
<w:DoNotShowComments/>
<w:DoNotShowInsertionsAndDeletions/>
<w:DoNotShowPropertyChanges/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">To the kids in life jackets who wanted the bottom of the ocean. Enjoy.</i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Her eyes hovered over his wide chest for a moment, trying to
evaluate the size, reimagining comfort. ‘<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Was
this the same chest that held her when she cried last night?’ </i>she thought.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As if on cue, he took her clenched fist and kissed it –
gently, as if he were holding an infant. As if he actually did love her. She lowered
her gaze, warm blood spreading across her face, until she felt a sting from her
nose, going up to her eyes. She blinked back hot tears.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m always here, you know,” he whispered, sweeping her hair
away from her cheeks.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I know.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But she knew she didn’t. At least her head failed to
understand.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Remember when we were kids and we wanted to dive deeper
into the reef but we were wearing stupid, orange life vests? No matter how much
we kicked the water, it always pushed us back to the surface.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He was silent.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Sometimes I feel like the things that keep us from the
things we think we truly want are the things that are keeping us alive.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She saw him picking invisible lint from her hair, twisting
the strands between his fingers; only the rhythm of their heavy breathing hung
on the air like a gray cloud about to pour.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Let’s take the life jacket off,” he finally said, his wild,
brown eyes bore into hers.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“John – “</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I mean, just this once, Claire. I’m sure the water’s going
to pull us back anyway.” A tentative pause like he wasn’t sure he was allowed
to say some more. “Stay with me.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She smiled, her head bobbing to the side in an attempt to
capture the childlike expression on his face. And as she closed her hands
around his, she also thought of the waves closing over their heads, water
filling their lungs.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While her head racked itself for words, nothing came out from
her throat but a gagged whisper she wasn’t sure was loud enough for him to
hear.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“But I can’t swim.”</div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-14793194839610361662017-06-23T02:26:00.000+08:002017-06-23T02:26:27.885+08:00Better Than The Sun<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-BtCYIZEa_iPkKAuAq3MLmho0gFgP-4Qfrj39vgLZxZsPlu5cmIuZ6Qi7VkHbhqhkp4VcMIXVMGMJELmt6_gkt3_2Y_QQ8HUj23iXxQMVyhXo6xL4peijTJvR4Llo4e3R6zxG04qPcA/s1600/tumblr_m7f27bWyKM1qmatryo1_1280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="853" data-original-width="1280" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-BtCYIZEa_iPkKAuAq3MLmho0gFgP-4Qfrj39vgLZxZsPlu5cmIuZ6Qi7VkHbhqhkp4VcMIXVMGMJELmt6_gkt3_2Y_QQ8HUj23iXxQMVyhXo6xL4peijTJvR4Llo4e3R6zxG04qPcA/s640/tumblr_m7f27bWyKM1qmatryo1_1280.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:DoNotShowRevisions/>
<w:DoNotPrintRevisions/>
<w:DoNotShowMarkup/>
<w:DoNotShowComments/>
<w:DoNotShowInsertionsAndDeletions/>
<w:DoNotShowPropertyChanges/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But who are you to steal the glory of the sunset? How dare you pull my
gaze from the orange rays to the edges of your face? How dare you make me
forget about the sea and the naked shore, blanketed with rows of sea shells
like white stars on a golden sky? How dare you fit my face in cupped hands like
I were worth something? Like I were something beautiful you wanted to keep. And
here, I try to fit yours in my small hands, like you were the sun itself. Like
you were the only beautiful thing left for me to see. Like you were what I said
I didn't need but actually do.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
She sits now, at the corner of
her bed, thinking of the knowing blazing sky while she religiously takes whiffs
of your shirt, intoxicated with the smell of you and your perfume, sending
tingles down to the tips of her toes. She sits, thinking, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">'How is this actually happening? And why are our moments together like a
bubble of portal, sucking in time like a day were an hour, and an hour, a
minute?' </i>She breaks into a crazy, lopsided smile and shakes her head, wrapping
herself around the thought that she might have just found something better than
torches lighting up the street. Something better than giant bonfires on the
beach. Something better than the sun.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-4822815271821990512017-05-27T18:07:00.001+08:002022-11-07T14:56:43.421+08:00Untitled<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:DoNotShowRevisions/>
<w:DoNotPrintRevisions/>
<w:DoNotShowMarkup/>
<w:DoNotShowComments/>
<w:DoNotShowInsertionsAndDeletions/>
<w:DoNotShowPropertyChanges/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
To trips unknown. To the ones who had little to no direction and are just now starting to see. Happy summer. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6yZkVER_YsWGu_hIGg7OD9c2TG8BjMm7bWu68KkiewWN64b_lSLFueLDNjdquA0yQkf0SupSqqbVgamfmtUl8M9hc5Olx01_OORepUBVX_RScy1FnQjI7clFm3QG1OlEPR_dIu9rfyQ/s1600/car-sky-sunset-travel-Favim.com-4011605.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="457" data-original-width="610" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6yZkVER_YsWGu_hIGg7OD9c2TG8BjMm7bWu68KkiewWN64b_lSLFueLDNjdquA0yQkf0SupSqqbVgamfmtUl8M9hc5Olx01_OORepUBVX_RScy1FnQjI7clFm3QG1OlEPR_dIu9rfyQ/s1600/car-sky-sunset-travel-Favim.com-4011605.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Water?” I asked him for the
third time this afternoon, bringing a bottle of water to his lips. His eyes
looked more exhausted than usual but his lips curled up to a smile, showing two
dimples on each side of his mouth. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Cute</i>,
I thought, but I fixed my eyes back on the road, scared the flush on my cheeks,
or the smile I was biting in would show. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">How
long has it been? </i>I ask myself over and over again, trying to remind myself
of how we met. Of how we ended up being in the same car and me handing him
water like I was offering a bottle of champagne. I frown at how pathetic I must
look.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Something wrong?” he asked,
raising both eyebrows – a puzzled look starting to brood on his face. “You can
change the music if you like.” He started fumbling over the buttons on the car
stereo in an attempt to change playlists.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I laughed, remembering how he
always over-interprets my responses. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Avoiding
great damage</i>, he always tells me. But if only he knew that the only problem
I had right now was my breathing and the drumming in my chest. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Inhale. Exhale. </i>I caught him looking at
me. I sucked in my breath, forgetting my breathing exercise, remembering how I
always told myself to master the art of pretense.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I – I made you something,” he
finally gushed, like water pushing its way out of the hole from a rickety dam.
“Nothing too big,” he continued, “I just thought you’d-you’d like a new playlist.
I mean, you don’t have to listen to it. I mean, only if you want – “</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I smiled and held his hand
resting on the steering wheel, feeling the rough edges of the scar snaking from
the back of his hand all the way down to his elbow. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">A flaw. The result of bad decisions, </i>he chuckles. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">An interesting engraving of your youth</i>,
I remind him back.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">If only you came earlier</i>, he once told me. I nodded, thinking how
things might have been. Will I have liked the former, innocent, and ungrazed
better? Or would I still have preferred the scarred guy driving right beside me
now. I wonder. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Arctic Monkey’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I Wanna Be Yours</i> started blaring through
the stereo and I jolted up in my seat. Surprised. Confused. Pleased. Like I
just started reading the first love letter I’ve ever received from someone.
Like how hot water from the shower pricks my skin before I start loving it
until I refuse to step out from the bathroom.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I thought you might have wanted
me to play it for you now,” he said apologetically.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Oh. I do, I do...thanks,” I
whispered back. “Perfect timings, yeah?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
And there, I thought, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">when you want something, you just do.
Regardless of scars. Regardless. Regardless. </i><span style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I marvel at the thought like hard candy in my mouth.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
With eyes still on the road, he
squeezed my hand before kissing the back of my hand. “Perfect timings.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-49760712947486083932017-03-15T16:23:00.004+08:002020-10-08T15:03:21.759+08:00Chanda's Log. Day 1*<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhglHth-NEIYrJohBBoQwO7u3ggGConrfF6Zmu2BuEZxCg3s_D082GeH-Bw1tt12J9bvmBRh8zPqcOxkCySyYhjcvv6dCKzPuJP8zNkfY8NGtl0gQ5V2CF-vYB9_h8FVe_RMceCDl-FeQ/s1600/living_room.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhglHth-NEIYrJohBBoQwO7u3ggGConrfF6Zmu2BuEZxCg3s_D082GeH-Bw1tt12J9bvmBRh8zPqcOxkCySyYhjcvv6dCKzPuJP8zNkfY8NGtl0gQ5V2CF-vYB9_h8FVe_RMceCDl-FeQ/s640/living_room.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Hello, dear world, reader, or whatever living thing is reading this. Or hello, future self, in case you're the only one who's ever read or will ever read this.</b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm writing this in an attempt to survive my twenty-second year, <i>aka </i><b>Valley of Death</b>, in which I throw in the yays and woes of a typical life of a baby adult: ME. If ever I don't make it to the twenty-third year, you know what to do. Tell my parents you could check this log for details.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Birthday yesterday was bland. As usual. Cupcake. A candle I've used the year before, and a hundred greetings from Facebook friends I haven't met yet in real life. And so I sat in front of the mirror, and did my face, before snapping a photo with my little cupcake. Pink and yellow with tiny edible purple beads dotting the dollop of cream. Copied a quote from Goodreads about life and living, and uploaded the thing on Instagram and Facebook, before wiping my face off with makeup removing wipes. Whoever invented self photos should be serving a death sentence now for throwing a burden of vanity on to the backs of people full of themselves. I eventually went back to bed and wasted six hours in front of my laptop screen watching a TV series I gave up today anyway.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I used to stand against our old door every time I age another year, although I stopped a few years back after stopping at 5 foot 6. I stopped growing. I stopped getting excited for another birthday, too. And I'm not entirely sure what else to feel now, with my special day reducing to chat messages and me staring at the fridge, contemplating on my lunch. Should I order pizza, or should I get canned sardines from the next corner store?</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><i>Ping. </i></b> </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">A message. A late birthday message. From him, no less. And my stupid, reckless lips curl into an equally stupid, reckless grin. <i>Stupid, stupid little girl</i>, I remind myself, slapping my cheeks lightly. <i>Of course a teacher could never like her student back. Even if he's older, much kinder, and taller than her. Even if he stops her mid-discussion because he had a better idea -- an idea they would be talking about even after classes -- she knew that was just impossible.</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">But, I secretly smiled anyway, and typed away my thanks, thinking, this will be gone in the morning. This will be gone.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i>*Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction<span style="font-family: inherit;">. N</span>ames, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents are either the products of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events are purely coincidental. </i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-22295164314278484232017-03-12T15:04:00.000+08:002017-03-12T15:29:24.815+08:00Letter to the Unbroken Spirit<div style="text-align: center;">
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:DoNotShowRevisions/>
<w:DoNotPrintRevisions/>
<w:DoNotShowMarkup/>
<w:DoNotShowComments/>
<w:DoNotShowInsertionsAndDeletions/>
<w:DoNotShowPropertyChanges/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4xOQq-1l_3v0xI_GRNh6UdGK8NRxWj1JBLy7Op281XI4EBEcabFQHVtIpBhM2pEQ9cnU2sj0zWZDI4E2vFFBVaY8WfUZ0CpjZapHbf96lEMy2ZbEMr5GmgNVjP5818ayn1s3DMPfEjA/s1600/gallery-1437764713-3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4xOQq-1l_3v0xI_GRNh6UdGK8NRxWj1JBLy7Op281XI4EBEcabFQHVtIpBhM2pEQ9cnU2sj0zWZDI4E2vFFBVaY8WfUZ0CpjZapHbf96lEMy2ZbEMr5GmgNVjP5818ayn1s3DMPfEjA/s640/gallery-1437764713-3.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
But there was a wall trying to get in the way between you
and me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
A guarded thick thing I said I'd break.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Although in the end, I haven't
even grazed you. And I don't think I ever will.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
That smug look you threw each I
time I said I was coming in.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
As if you liked it. As if you knew you'd run away
again anyway.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
In spite of me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
And that thick thing that stood between us still
stood.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Prouder than ever.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
A haughty stance, gleaming with a nasty air of
arrogance.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Keeping you away.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Keeping me out.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Keeping us from killing each
other, you said.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Although, I thought, what if vines that meet never really
strangle each other?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
What if the wrappings are a cling,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
while they snake their way to the sunlight - </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
a cry for love and a hope of redemption?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
I thought but didn't say,<br />
so the wall still stood.<br />
It stood there until I forgot your face.<br />
Until I forgot your eyes. <br />
Until I forgot you.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-13070912097329566642016-12-29T22:14:00.001+08:002017-05-27T18:37:55.919+08:00Tell Me What To Name This Thing<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Perhaps it was the way he draped
his long arms around my shoulders that made me restless the whole night.
Nothing has changed. It was as if I were back eight years ago, sharing my last
dance with him. Only this time, I had more questions. How his stares began to
deepen and linger. How he comes to me, to place a hand on my waist and whisper
if I was enjoying the night. Or if I wanted more wine. I was sinking. Deeper.
And I was not sure if I wanted to climb out the hole I was digging for myself.
Again.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Before I left he came from
behind, his breath crawling on the side of my cheek, my chest laboring for more
air. And I remembered how he pulled me in for a dance a long time ago. Eight years
ago he was breathing against my neck, and I dropped my hands from his shoulders
to his arms, his fingers tracing my bare back up and down, down to the hem of
the deep blue gown just below my waist. We swayed a little. He kept his hands
on my waist – sometimes going up my back. “Thank you,” he said, and I smiled
and asked what he was saying his thanks for. But he only answered me with his
crazy grin, before moving closer, his nose brushing against my cheek.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Time was an ocean, and eight years
later, I was still waiting for him to say more, but he only rubbed my shoulders
with his warm hands before I felt him press his lips against my hair. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
P.S. Another flash fic to keep my mind off things for a while.</div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-30107910402646747722016-12-19T23:10:00.002+08:002016-12-19T23:37:24.031+08:00Closing a Roller Coaster Year<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i>I MISS WRITING! AND I KNOW I OWE
THIS DORMANT BLOG A POST.<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9YzEgFU3XAY43K76v7yvYfUff0r-XZz1bi1fb4VjzoPbyghHbZyeNrv3aikFs-1U_ygvKn32wX8xDp986R8mtEM6eMNErzMg6p0A-UBS1gziLyVXqXLm-JzMEENANPjZizn-OJm_xdw/s1600/tumblr_n24lspHlf11sbs6w2o1_500.gif" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="358" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9YzEgFU3XAY43K76v7yvYfUff0r-XZz1bi1fb4VjzoPbyghHbZyeNrv3aikFs-1U_ygvKn32wX8xDp986R8mtEM6eMNErzMg6p0A-UBS1gziLyVXqXLm-JzMEENANPjZizn-OJm_xdw/s1600/tumblr_n24lspHlf11sbs6w2o1_500.gif" width="640" /></a></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
There had been a lot of changes
this year. Mostly, temporal. I haven’t really been in my best shape when I
entered 2016 but I was hopeful that things will fall in their rightful places.
I’m not entirely convinced my readers want to catch up on what has been
happening lately, given I was not really a good blogger this year, but I find
it most comforting to write down things. To make things at least more organized
in letters, having such a crazy mess of a mind. So, here is a list of my crazy
year, in chronological order.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
<span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>1. </b></span><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">I
QUIT LAW SCHOOL</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
I finished one
term, finally convinced, law really isn’t for me (although I did, and still do
love a good argument). It was really out of respect (for my mom) that I started
law school, thinking I might grow to love it if I try. Unfortunately, since I
juggled it with work (teaching preschool), I barely had time to study. Also, I
was having depressed nights where I just cry and loathe the thought of work and
class the next day, having no clear vision of me in the court. In the end, I
gave up, dreading the thought of 5 years of that, and a lifetime of regret.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">2. I
ENROLLED FOR A MASTERS DEGREE</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
I might have
been more vocal about this on Facebook. I jumped on the first train in the
Culture and Arts Studies masters program in the Philippines, being in the
pioneering batch. I’ve always loved the folk. The culture. The Arts. And, I
thought, “Finally, I have this niche to grow in!” And perfectly fit my dream of
becoming a filmmaker. Soon, I was attending literature and theater
seminars and conferences. I was collaborating with the indigenous and fellow
artists, writing poems. It was a dream come true, but I guess things like these
have their stop point, too.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">3. I
STARTED TEACHING IN COLLEGE</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
So from
preschool, I skipped to the older generation and taught college. I’m having a
grand time, so far, being in a bigger and more corporate setting, compared to
the small school I have taught in previously. Benefits are more defined
(although not as much as in public schools), and relationships with peers are
less personal. I started teaching Oral Communication, Remedial English, Art
Appreciation (Humanities), Philippine Literature, and World Literature in the
first semester, and now I handle additional subjects in Writing in the
Discipline (English 2), Intercultural Communications Studies, Argumentation and
Debate, Preparation and Evaluation of Instructional Materials (English 111),
and Introduction to Linguistics. I never thought I’d be able to handle major
subjects, but here I am, reviewing like I’m back in college.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
But things are
beautiful with my students. I was able to meet people with struggles I didn’t
know a college student could have. Although I have a lot of wealthy students, I’ve
also had students who are working full-time while in school (<i>imagine that!</i>), students who have kids
of their own, students who have taken drugs, and students who do not have a
permanent home. I could only think of my position as a privilege. To be in a
position to help is a privilege. I wouldn’t have it any other way.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">4. I
JOINED A PAGEANT</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
I have been open
about this on my Facebook, too. After being requested by my long-time makeup
artist, Ely Tagalog, to join the screening, I succumbed. Little did I know, I
would garner the most awards (Alex Artistic Salon’s Choice Award, Tartilicious
Darling Award, Best in Ororama Casual, Miss Pepsi-Cola, Best in
Maranao-inspired Wear, Best in Talent, Miss Photogenic), win 1<sup>st</sup>
runner-up, brush shoulders with the big wigs (city officials, big-time business
people, national pageant coaches), and be selected to represent the city in
this “other” national pageant. Plus, the monetary prize really helped ease the
financial tension at home that time. I could only thank the Lord at how
generous He’s been with me the whole time!</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">5. I
QUIT MY MASTERS</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
I’m not saying
I’m not going back. Just a cease-fire from everything, I guess. After three lovely
semesters of being in the program, I have decided to take a break unless I want
to compromise my performance. Having juggled this with my schedule with work
and pageantry, I have reached the point of realizing I couldn’t do it all. So,
I pause for a moment, and choose a more practical load.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">6. I
TOOK PROFESSIONAL EDUCATION UNITS</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0px;">
This is only for
one semester. 18 units, where I only have after my work in the college ends. I
know it’s not easy, but it is more realistic. More practical for somebody who
wants to work for the government. So, I take the Licensure exam for Teachers
next year, although I am still unsure where the Lord will place me after my
contract with the school I am now working in.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;">7. I
MOVED OUT</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
Along with the
changes this year, I decided to move out from home for independence, although I
am also in the stage of contemplating whether or not I go back home (because I just moved 10 minutes closer to my work place). I did
calculations and decided it would be financially more practical to go back home
and use my rent (and food) money to help with some bills, so I would probably
be back in my old bed early next year.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>BUT YEAH.</b> You probably aren’t interested in
all these things, but I just thought this would clear my head a bit, especially
now that I’m facing a lot more work this week with all the papers to check and
the exams to take. But, <i>man</i>, I knew I
had a crazy year, but I never realized I had this much change going on!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<span style="text-align: justify;">2016 really has been a year of
transition. I wonder how other people do it: </span><i style="text-align: justify;">settling right after graduation like making a decision is so easy for
them</i><span style="text-align: justify;">. I was always tempted to want to live the way they do, but, I believe
everybody has a crazy life like mine, I just don’t see it right. I still am
happy to have gone through several changes though. No regrets, and no “what
ifs”. I’ve had a roller coaster ride this year and I wouldn’t have it any other
way. Although, of course, I hope I’d have a smoother course next year.</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Hugs and Kisses,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Aine</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>P.S. OMG this is so rushed, did I just write my year as a bland post? I felt I had a lot of mistakes in this post. I'll go over it for the editing but I just had to post this before my internet connection goes nasty on me again.</b></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-73528400571758799082016-08-19T12:27:00.002+08:002016-08-19T12:40:49.191+08:00To More Trying...<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
As promised, I'm back after I submitted my students' grades to the registrar. There <b>is</b> a new pile of papers to check this time for midterm though, and I am currently trying to absorb my new schedule. Because MSU-IIT is following a new school calendar now, our semester for masters class starts right in the middle of St. Peter's College's first semester. I'm still trying to figure out how to adjust to the time frames of both schools, WHILE trying to adjust to the shifting of roles (student-to-teacher-and-teacher-to-student).</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkD0bcj8Cszyf2zq7KEQUWf5KMY0lumAemP-itcOUINem32LKvs43HPMaATVtbe77qlKP8LbASBcRzuMm95UX3KeHcT4OKXTF0fKIAHFI2NibYNeBG87OVJ51tINsDbVqq6Fj59en6hw/s1600/IMG_20160801_111305.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkD0bcj8Cszyf2zq7KEQUWf5KMY0lumAemP-itcOUINem32LKvs43HPMaATVtbe77qlKP8LbASBcRzuMm95UX3KeHcT4OKXTF0fKIAHFI2NibYNeBG87OVJ51tINsDbVqq6Fj59en6hw/s640/IMG_20160801_111305.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>Here's an angle of my natural, working habitat. (Well, 1/5 of the time, anyway.)</i></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I do love my job, however, and I'm still trying (or hoping) to squeeze in my activities and responsibilities in my short days. September is only a few sleeps away, and, not sure if I'm allowed to tell already but, I'm entering this annual city pageant after much urging from my mom (and my dad, sort of) and our decade-long makeup artist who happened to have handled my mom's sister (Miss Iligan 2007) and several other pageant queens in the past.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Sometimes I wonder if all these are actually happening to me right now. Not only is my schedule jam-packed, I also am not sure if I could truly handle this with grace. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Things are slipping as I am catching other things. So slowly...slower than you, maybe, I try to take several steps backward, and probably pick up the pieces that have fallen in my blinded busyness.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Thank You for Your new mercies every day, dear Lord.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-92010774076685608392016-07-28T13:30:00.001+08:002016-07-28T13:34:36.315+08:00Learning Teaching: 2-in-1<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Juggling a dual life has never been this difficult! Now a college instructor and a masters student in Culture and Arts Studies, I barely have time to write a decent post. To make up, I am posting a <b>rough draft</b> of a short story I submitted as part of the compilation of works for my Creative Writing class. And oh, if we're friends on Facebook, you'd probably know why I chose the Subanen people as the main characters in this story. (My final thesis + project would be on the Subanen people, their unrecorded tales, and their <i>balians</i>, shamans and their traces in the contemporary Juan, Filipino.) Enjoy, you guys! I'll be back after I submit all my requirements (both for my masters and my students' grades)!</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #0c343d;">The Appointed</span></b></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<div style="display: inline !important;">
<i><span style="color: #0c343d;">Katherine Aine Codas</span></i></div>
</div>
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“I saw an angel at the swamp today,” Gido whispered. His eyes were on my hands clutched around the wooden pestle. I was pounding the burnt rice father brought home from the harvest before the sun rose and my shirt has already started sticking to my torso, and my damp hair to my forehead. In a few days <i>Bae</i> Neneng will be asking for her share of grain for the <i>pangasi</i>, the rice wine, for the next moon’s wedding. Today is not a good day to be bothered if I do not want to get the promised two pesos so I rolled my eyes and continued pounding the remaining grain. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“He is very strange,” he continued in his high-pitched, goat-like voice, disturbing the rhythm of the pounding and the thrusting of my pestle. We used to kid around him, teasing him that he really came from the goat’s belly. But when he starts crying “<i>Baaaaa!</i>” Nanay would stop preparing all meals and lumber down to the kwarto with her heavy calves to pick up the dried up guava branch she saves for our squabbles and whip our legs.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“I didn’t know they glowed, like carabao milk. Or that they do not have wings.”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">I stopped pounding, wiped the sweat that had trickled down my chin, and gave him an incredulous look, my hand finding its way to my hip.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“Did you notice I’m not listening?” I whipped back at him. But he was too busy tracing his finger on the damp sand beside his foot; he did not notice the irritation in my voice. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“He also talked about God. That’s when I said, ‘<i>Ayo</i>, my suspicions were right!’” Gido was now engrossed in his own story, he started flapping his arms up and down to keep my attention. “So I asked him about paradise and he answered in detail! Gold everywhere, he said. And shiny stones. And a lot of singing.”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“How did he tell you? Does an angel really speak our tongue?” Nothing seemed to deter him so, defeated, I sat down on a stump and rested the pestle on my lap, watching the sun rise behind the <i>bentud</i> – the hill across the <i>Konakon</i>, the collector’s house. I wanted to test him. How come a young boy who only plays with his bird traps in the swamp gets to see a <i>diwata</i> and I don’t?</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">I waited for him to raise his chin. He nodded.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“He does. Although they sounded magical. Different,” he replied in a sudden, hushed tone, as if he were sharing a secret. “At first they sounded odd, like he were stretching his mouth, and he messes with the words. But I understood him. I understood him. Could I be…”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“Could be what?”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“The next, you know…”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“<i>Balian</i>?”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">He shrugged, digging his sole into the ground, eyes darting from one jar of wine to another. They were stacked in a corner beside the <i>kamalig</i>. “I mean, perhaps, that’s why I can talk to angels.”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">I looked at my younger brother and sighed. He’s only been around a few harvests and I’m not sure if someone as young as him could be the chosen one. Besides, the <i>pintow</i> has stopped being a school for priest way before the day I was born. The last time I’ve been there, the men were stacking sacks of rice on top of each other. Beside it now stood our church the big people over the seas have built for us. I watched Gido’s stringy hair stick upwards like dried grass – brown from playing too much under the sun. He couldn’t possibly be one, could he?</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">That afternoon I found myself wandering around the swamp, thinking about Gido, and thinking about the foolishness of someone of marrying age believing a little boy’s stories. The swamp was right behind the <i>bentud</i> – the hill where we gathered for our weddings and funerals. And although sacred, as the elders have told me, nothing would tell one it is, until the day we actually meet.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><i>Careful with the traps</i>, I reminded myself, remembering the last time I got caught in one of Benito’s traps sitting between the bushful of pako, as I tarried around the edges of the swamp, avoiding the tied twigs. I was half-hoping to meet an angel myself. Perhaps if I turn around the other corner…</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“<i>Baes Gendow!</i>” a golden head peeked from a short molave tree. I stared at him, wide-eyed. At his white shirt wrapping his upper body. One of his hands is raised, wrapped around the neck of a wild heron. He grinned, showing a row of white pearls. I nod, still confused if Gido would still be the balian now that I have seen the angel with my own eyes too. His head was shiny like it was covered in gugo, and his hair twirled right above his eyebrows like they never move.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">Eventually, I found myself visiting the swamp every day as soon as I finished my chores, trying to talk to the angel, but I always found myself just sitting behind the rubber tree, feeling the cuts beneath my fingers, chewing betel nut, and staring at the angel walking around the bentud, looking at the small caves or the fringes of the swamp. Sometimes he glances at me before he flashes his pearls again. I nod. Again – that’s all I do. Because when he tries to speak he stretches the words like he forgot to adjust his speech when he fell from the skies. To that, I cannot speak back.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“<i>Ate</i> Gaying?” Gido gasped when he found me squatting behind the rubber tree one quiet afternoon. The sun was hitting the other side of the bentud so it was a little cooler where we were and Gido was just about to lay another bird trap on a mossy rock on the swamp. His fingers fumbled for a loose knot for one of the twigs. “So you found the angel too?” His smile was mischievous but there was satisfaction in his eyes like I owed him something.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“Hello!” the angel interrupted us. “Do you not live on this hill?”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">I shook my head while Gido started explaining where the people’s houses were, naming them one by one.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“And, we live right over there!” Gido beamed, pointing at our home, raised a little higher than the other houses with taller stilts – our pigs, tied below our bamboo floor.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">The angel hummed in response, sounding happier than usual. “So no one on this hill?”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">Gido and I shook our heads. A swell feeling has immediately filled our chests, happy for making the angel happy with our answers.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">Every afternoon, we found ourselves sitting together by the swamp to look at the angel cutting a few branches and drawing lines on paper. Sometimes we chew betel nut while watching, and sometimes, Gido would crack a fallen <i>durian</i> open to share with the angel.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“Is he writing instructions from God?” Gido whispered. I wanted to ask the angel but I was too distracted with his golden hair gleaming under the sun, and the glowing skin as white as carabao milk. Gido was right about that, while our own skin had darkened by staying too long outside, like roasted corn.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">Gido and I started walking home one evening with the same questions in mind. A gush of wind rustled the bamboo leaves that had been sleeping since morning, and my brother was unusually silent.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“Do you think two can be <i>balians</i>?” he blurted out, kicking the rocks beneath his feet, a disappointed look brooding on his face now. His arms were hugging a bundle of firewood we were supposed to bring back for the wedding. Four days from now, our bentud would be filled with people again, gathering for the Timuay’s daughter’s wedding, Aya. Next harvest, I hope it would be my turn. I accidentally overheard mother and father talking about Benito last night and his showing of interest. Perhaps it was my turn to count the moons now.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“<i>Baes gobi!</i>” Gido and I greeted everyone when we came home, shaking the dust from our feet. The elders were sitting on our floor, sharing a few <i>panyalam</i> pieces like somebody just died, but they were not talking. Instead, the older ones were wiping their eyes and the rest were downing on glasses of <i>tuba</i>.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">I lay in bed that night wondering if a <i>balian</i> should wed first before the actual appointment. The confusion of roles between me and my brother has not stopped gnawing at my head like a stubborn field rat that I ended up just staring at the roof, popping pieces of <i>lanzones</i> lazily in my mouth. I watched the small bats fly in and out of the house, perching at the farthest corner of the kitchen.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“We should ask the angel, <i>Ate</i> Gaying,” Gido whispered from the other mat. Surprised to see him wide awake, I twisted my body to the right to look at his face better. The nearly full moon has conveniently stopped right outside our open window, hitting Gido’s face with a golden glow. I was almost convinced he looked like somebody the spirits could call. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“I’m not sure about that,” I faintly replied, reaching for another piece of lanzones. “We’re not even sure if we still need balians here.”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“But you saw the angel too. We can’t just pretend he wasn’t there. We could die, right?”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">There was a hint of excitement in his voice, but so was uncertainty. Sometimes I regret having told too many stories about our grandfather to my brother. Although he had been the last balian in our place, he died a Christian, shedding off what remains of his role as a shaman. Gido seemed to have listened only to the portions when our grandfather talked to angels and spirits for powers.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">I nod. “Okay.”</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">But the angel was no longer by the swamp the next day, nor the day after that. And Gido had stopped finishing his meals, worried he would miss the angel’s short-lived visit. He would sprint to the swamp still with food in his mouth but it was the same every day. There was no angel walking around the hill. There was no angel writing lines on paper. It was now back to the same hill before we started seeing him. Except on the third sunrise. We woke up to a huge booming sound, setting off a series of cries from the houses beside us. Gido and I ran outside to see what happened. The <i>bentud</i> was no longer the <i>bentud</i>. There was no more grass. There were no more flowers and weeds. But there were people starting to gather around what was left of the hill. Whispering. Crying. Praying.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;">“It’s scraped away,” I heard the older children whisper in disbelief. The brown lump of soil has replaced our view of green. I looked around, confused, and saw more angels, climbing on the large trucks that were taking more and more of our <i>bentud</i>. And one of them, still in white, was our angel.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
_________________________________________________________________________________</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Author’s Notes:</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
This short story is an attempt to capture a moment from the years of exploitation of the mining companies to the Subanen people who are still fighting for the rights of their own ancestral domain. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-49846429406882480742016-04-03T22:39:00.002+08:002020-10-19T12:56:40.421+08:002 AM<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<i>Hey, guys. I think I started writing this short sometime in January and if I had not discovered the draft last night, I would not have remembered finishing it. And, well, I got impatient so I tried to wrap it up today. I might edit it somewhere sometime so consider this a work in progress (including my lazy title). But I hope this is decent enough. Enjoy! And, oh! Tell me what you think.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Fourth Part.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
She sucks in her breath again and
feels the folds of her sheets in the dark, letting the coolness rub on her
burning skin. Her ready-made blue satin dress has covered her up after all,
just like what the sales attendant said, except for a few areas where it starts
to skimp – the tear from the slit showing right above her left thigh. She
presses her thumb over the purple spot on her knee and winces. She forgets
where she got the bruise, although she does have a slight memory of her driving
Paul’s minivan.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Paul. Her mouth twitches sourly
as she remembers the name. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“It’s <i>two</i> in the <i>morning</i>.” Lara
stands by the door frame, her right hand coming to her hip, and her other
clutching several sheets of paper. Nicole stares at her, blinking slowly as if
she were fighting the urge to close her eyes. As if her ears are not burning
and her chest isn’t too tight to breathe. She blinks slowly, trying to recall how
her roommate suddenly appeared in front of her.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I know,” she whispers,
half-wondering how she got home.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
She rolls off from the bed before
sprinting to the bathroom to throw up for the third time in the last two hours.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“You think you could get away
with this because I <i>always </i>let you in
the gate even though it’s way past curfew. I have a life too, you know. I’m not
studying every night so you can come in whenever you want to.” She pauses
tentatively, eyes hovering at her roommate’s black bra strap dangling loose
from her right shoulder. “You look like a mess, by the way.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I know,” Nicole manages to
squeak out before another gurgling sound from her throat and into the toilet.
The smell of booze and vomit clings to the atmosphere. Lara pinches her nose in
annoyance.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“You’re gross.” </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
She blinks back hot tears. “I
know.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Her head spins for a moment before
she actually drops her head back on her pillow, and her roommate’s voice slur
into nothing. The tear on her blue satin slit zips an inch higher.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>First Part.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Hey,” his sweet deep voice rings
through her ear. She sometimes makes mental comparisons of it with their
favorite hot chocolate Paul's mom used to make. She bites her lips.<i><o:p></o:p></i><br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“It’s <i>two</i> in the <i>morning</i>.” She
reaches for her bedside clock just to make sure. She wants to sound annoyed but
she couldn’t help smiling. She misses him; two in the morning doesn’t bother
her at all.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I know,” he whispers. “Open up.
I’m outside.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Say what again?” Nicole rubs her
eyes and starts clambering down the hall towards the bathroom to brush her
teeth. The last thing she wants lover boy to remember this hour is her morning
breath. She grabs the nearly finished tube of toothpaste and squeezes in panic.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The bun she had on the whole day
has made her hair wavier than usual, she realizes; she presses the fringes to
her forehead and sighs. Perhaps it wouldn’t bother him. Perhaps he’d overlook
the uncoordinated purple tank top and blue pajamas. Perhaps he wouldn’t even
notice.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Paul,” she calls out to him who
is conveniently leaning on a silver minivan, both his hands occupied with a few
bags. She checks her hair with the car window for the last time.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“McDonald’s. I remember it wakes
you up the fastest. So which one’s first? Fries?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I love you.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
He winks before scooping her into
the minivan’s roof, her long and wavy hair brushing against his cheeks.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Second Part.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Nicole slumps herself into the
mountain of pillows on her carpet – the ones she’d missile-thrown five minutes
ago. It has been four days since her disastrous date with Paul. To her, anyway.
The picture of the disinterested look on his face that day does not leave her
head. <i>What was wrong with her? </i>She
wanted to ask. It appears to her that the longer they spend time with each
other, the more she notices him glancing at his phone; his “Huh’s” increased by
a third. She looks at the mirror and makes mental notes on her appearance: a
stubborn dot of acne bore itself on her chin like a shiny bead, and her hair
falls flat with grease.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“For the nth time, you look <i>fine</i>, Nicole,” Lara putters, exasperated,
her eyes half-leaving the stack of books on her study desk. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Fine. Okay. Just fine. Probably
why he scooted over to the next hot girl in his class. Because I was just <i>fine</i>.” Nicole presents herself to her
roommate and frowns. She can feel the grease on her face now, too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“He’s good for nothing, okay? And
stop making your world revolve around him. I mean, look at you!” Lara clutches
her wrist and starts fixing her hair that has hopelessly stuck on her
tear-stained cheeks. “You are <i>so </i>much
better off without him. Sometimes I wonder what you see in him.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“I wonder, too,” she half smiles,
although it doesn’t hide her bloodshot eyes and the swollen, purple spot just
below her chin.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Third Part.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The tension on her jaw and the
tightness of her hands wrapped around the steering wheel turns her knuckles
white. A streak of mascara stains her cheek, and in her head is a waging battle
of ramming the minivan to the nearest tree and driving forever. Her phone beeps
for the seventeenth time now. She’s always liked the details, he had said. Like
remembering how many times he tapped his leg before he finally asked her out to
the movies. Like how many times he said I love you the day they first fought.
Sixty-seven. Or, like how many times he called the day after their last fight.
Zero.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Her phone beeps again as she
hurriedly pulls over the driveway. <i>Eighteen
now</i>. She finally picks it up and decides to read the message. “Give me the
car back,” she grunts before sweeping the back of her hand up her cheek to wipe
another tear that escapes. How long has it been this way?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
She stumbles over the bag of
trash graciously blocking the entrance to their apartment. Her eyes have failed
her yet again. It was difficult to try to find the way home with a bucketful of
tears spilling from her ducts after all. Her knees sting so bad, but not as bad
as how her chest feels. Burning. Perhaps it was all a mistake. Perhaps if she
had believed him when he said they were just friends even after she caught them
making out in his minivan, everything would still be alright. Perhaps she was
too dramatic for this. Perhaps there was nothing to worry about. Perhaps it was
all in her head. She gasps for air before turning the knob.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Fifth Part.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Thank God for cafes that open
overnight. Macchiato!” Nicole announces, waving two cups in front of her
roommate after she pushes the door open with her foot. The room is cool like
the air conditioning has been turned on for hours. She shakes her head,
remembering she used to have a miser of a roommate. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Careful. I don’t want that
spilling on my desk,” Lara says, not looking up, but grinning. She is hunched
over a stack of papers. Again. Her hair swept up in a clean bun. “And thank
you! I’ve been dying to go get coffee but I just cannot <i>not</i> finish this first.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Wow, what’s with you?” Nicole
asks, putting down the coffee. “No exams?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
She shakes her head. “Sketching
time.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Good idea. About time I did
something too, you know. Clay modeling? Whittling?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Lara hums her response and the silence
continues to hang in the air. Not painfully, though. Peacefully, like when you
walk into a room with a mother lulling her child to sleep. Peacefully, like
when you finally rouse from your bed and realize you’re off for the day. Nicole
smiles at herself. At the childishness of the recent months. At her foolish
spirit. At her roommate finally getting her nose off her books for one night.
She picks up her coffee to her lips and makes a little sip. More cream than
usual. She doesn’t like cream, but this time she doesn’t mind.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“You forgot the muffins you said
you’d buy?” Lara asks, breaking the silence in the room. “Do you want me to get
some? I think I’m done. What time is it?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Her head still wants to float
with her thoughts for a few more minutes but her roommate is looking at her.
Like she is getting impatient. Like she is suddenly into time and clocks but
does not want to read one. Like she is concerned her roommate has gone deaf.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“It’s two in the morning,” Nicole
whispers and she feels a buzz in her pocket. <i>A faint one.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Half-wondering but half-hoping,
she digs into her pocket and takes out her phone. Maybe she should blame her
phone for dying, but she chuckles at her own silliness and at the blank screen –
turned off and useless. To her, anyway. For now. Or tomorrow too, who knows? She
slips it back before checking the time again. It’s 2:01 in the morning.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-14180314674510709992016-03-06T19:05:00.001+08:002020-09-16T18:20:47.833+08:00To the Independent Man: You Are Not Christ<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">In a world of hustle and vision boards for success, perhaps one of the most celebrated words in the 21st century is <b>independence.</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjibecLW-qw-RnpLoBc4hiazTiqaHK8bNRko9R6niELts6Ks86jT3bArFr0-1SPo6uJx31T228qG29AhXCkPi8N87UML97jZ48YXp2i5AxviaVisXzQA3sgMghUcAFYrAI6qALyIYeFbQ/s1600/12834790_551092531725894_1807926369_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="427" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjibecLW-qw-RnpLoBc4hiazTiqaHK8bNRko9R6niELts6Ks86jT3bArFr0-1SPo6uJx31T228qG29AhXCkPi8N87UML97jZ48YXp2i5AxviaVisXzQA3sgMghUcAFYrAI6qALyIYeFbQ/s640/12834790_551092531725894_1807926369_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Nothing’s wrong with the word, really. In a competitive society, you’ve always been encouraged to strive, compete, excel, and work, else you’d fall behind the billions who’ve been trying to make through life longer than you’ve been. And that’s true. You don’t sit around waiting for the fish to flip from the water and land on your lap. That does not happen in real life (unless you’re going boating on a river teeming with ADHD fish waiting to be <i>fired</i> up).</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Many too often we find ourselves forgetting <b>the essence of the good news</b> we have received about God’s kingdom (we are saved by grace). Even Paul was perplexed with the Galatians who seemed to have forgotten how they were saved, going back to the law to “add justification” through works – and it had only been less than a century since Jesus Christ’s ascension! It’s human nature, isn’t it? No matter the situation, we are constantly driven by our proud nature to do something about our life concerns, to make it work, etc. <i>We take things into our own hands.</i> Perhaps you get back at that guy who cut in line. Maybe you do the whole job yourself when your team doesn’t do anything. Maybe you jump on a job offer without waiting for consultation because it’s a crazy world out there and it might be too late when you try to take the time to think it over. Or, maybe, when you get (or don’t get) caught in sin, you try to patch things up yourself <span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN-PH; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">–</span> work harder though good deeds to eliminate the sin.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
But of course, you won’t admit it. You most likely won’t even notice it.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
My head says I was saved by grace – by the blood of Jesus Christ shed on the cross – but after deep thought, I realized I don’t really practice what I say I knew. When I do a good deed, I <i>feel more saved</i> than I’ve been before. I <i>feel closer to heaven </i>the more I engage in service than when I haven’t. When I fail in the good deeds department or fall into sin, I don’t <i>feel forgiven</i> until I’ve done a greater good – more time in service, extended Bible studies, etc. And when the guilt makes it harder to believe God would not get tired of my apologies, I drift into a stagnant phase – not doing anything about it at all. Have you ever felt the same way? </div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><b>My dear reader, do not mistake joy in bearing fruits with salvation.</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Peter, who was so sure he loved Jesus there was no way he’d deny Him, denied Jesus three times just as predicted! After Christ’s death, he went back to fishing, disheartened and discouraged at his denial and of the death of his Lord. This is normal; you’d probably run into this point a few times in your life. And that is fine. Just because you’re a Christian does not mean you would no longer disappoint God. This is no excuse to cling on to sin, however. In fact, this truth should motor us towards Jesus – in humility. For what are we but believers in our earth suits?</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
After Christ’s resurrection, He went to the disciples who were fishing all night and when John told Peter, “It is the Lord!” Peter wrapped his outer garment around him and jumped (threw himself) into the water. (<i><span style="color: #4c1130;">John 21:7</span></i>)</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Imagine having denied your Lord and Friend three times after you swore you wouldn’t and He shows up in front of you, smiling – resurrected. Every time I read this portion of the passage I start tearing up, thinking how Peter must’ve felt when his Lord comes back after he denies their relationship. How he must have been so excited to fall to Christ’s feet. How he must have felt a little miserable inside, wondering what could happen next.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Peter was a leader, having leader-tendencies – leading, initiating, working with his hands, etc. But there really are things you could not do on your own. Peter’s own grace (or efforts) could not vindicate himself. Neither do yours.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b style="font-weight: bold;">You are not Christ. </b>You could follow the thousands of religious rituals known to mankind and still be lost. Just because you feel better after doing something good does not mean you are forgiven through it. Grace is not earned. Why act like it is? Again, it goes unnoticed most of the time. After all, are not good deeds, well, good?</div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #4c1130;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #4c1130;"><b>“Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?” Galatians 3:3</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #4c1130;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #4c1130;"><b>“Does God give you His Spirit and work miracles among you because you observe the law, or because you believe what you heard?” Galatians 3:5</b></span></div>
<b><br /></b>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
This strikes me hard and deep because my subconscious gets confused sometimes. Of course I knew good deeds are and should only be consequences of my faith and that’s what I tell people when I share the gospel. But the selfish in me still thinks there’s no such thing as free lunch; hence, it gets a little restless when not driven by effort. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-style: italic;"><br /></span></div>
<i><div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>“You mean, we can’t work for grace and mercy? Isn’t it too much to receive? What do we do?”</i></div>
</i><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Isn’t that why we call it grace and mercy?<b> Because no matter how much we try, our efforts could not afford the value of His Grace.</b> But the good thing is this: the God we serve – the Great I AM – is good. He is full of grace and mercy – generous to those who seek His face. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Good deeds, fruits, are good, yes. But remember, independent reader, that they do not cause our righteousness. They are merely responses to it. The quantity of works does not add up to nor take away God’s love or your righteousness. One does not bear fruits apart from Christ.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It is a difficult battle with your sinful nature. It is tempting to think you had a share in this blessed life. It is tempting to think you are favored because you did good or because you spent more time serving or reading the Bible. But remember, independent reader, that there is nothing much better than depending on the Lord. His favors are at His disposal. His gift of salvation is not earned, and our efforts – big or small – could not discount its greatness.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Look to Him, my friend. Yes, look at Jesus. You are only a branch living off the living vine. You are not Christ.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-89965947175635707952015-11-25T21:10:00.005+08:002015-11-25T21:13:04.336+08:00Updates, updates, updates!<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I apologize for the lack of
update, guys! Times are hard and hectic. Although I’m not pushing my one
hundred percent for Law School (like some of my friends are thinking), I still
do attend classes after work, leaving me exhausted and dying for an adequate
rest for the next grueling work day. And I’m not mentioning how far our home is
from the city proper. Basically, I get home past eleven in the evening (because
my mom has to ride with me and I have to wait for her) and sleep two hours
after because I still have to clean up the mess I’ve made in the morning (and
feed the pets, too).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
This set-up is the reason why I’m
not posting as often as I did before. My head can’t even focus on a single
topic without shifting to another one! Probably the fatigue. Or PMS. I’m not
sure. Nevertheless, the excuses aren’t heavy enough, I know. I’ll try to keep
up. In fact, I’ve been working on this experimental short story for a while
now. I just can’t seem to move forward with a muddled head, constantly floating
with pressure. I’ve been telling myself to work faster so I could publish it
here, but the more excited I get, the slower my thoughts run. Frustrating, is
it not?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I’ll try to finish my piece soon
so I could share it with you. Speaking of sharing, there are still a lot going
on that I have yet to share with you. Like things that are going to happen when
the year ends. Things that are going to happen when <i>the school year</i> ends. Things that I <i>desire</i> to happen. Or things that have <i>already </i>happened. I’ll save these for future posts. I still can’t
get myself to spill them all on a single, random, fill-up post. It’s just too
much, don’t you think?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
If you’re reading this, thank you
so much! You are so cute for staying with me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Loving you with the love of the
Lord,</div>
<b style="text-align: justify;">Aine</b><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
P.S. Would you look at that. This post is more blog-gy.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-51428076295984450112015-09-30T12:18:00.004+08:002015-10-01T10:24:07.211+08:00Feeling Earth<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd5oe9F6TRqfVGcHIh836mEgboHrUFFOEOHu_-fGttpHALcWJ5n1FjzZrikRNL5TzI3un9jRte4-JCwSVDfjy0mC7DS6bO-gzKAUotKtBsYYnPxmQVuqF3OwXFNF7ztlyyi9_PwDapZg/s1600/feeling+earth.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd5oe9F6TRqfVGcHIh836mEgboHrUFFOEOHu_-fGttpHALcWJ5n1FjzZrikRNL5TzI3un9jRte4-JCwSVDfjy0mC7DS6bO-gzKAUotKtBsYYnPxmQVuqF3OwXFNF7ztlyyi9_PwDapZg/s1600/feeling+earth.png" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I found myself going through the <i>Humans of New York</i> page this morning,
reading several Syrian refugee stories, reminding myself that I ought to avoid
the usual posts on the city fiesta and the popular love team hundreds of
thousands (if not millions) have gotten crazy over. Eventually, I started to
break into tears when I realized how many the refugees were and how far I am
from actually seeing them in person. There they are, thousands of miles away
from me, each with a distinct and complicated story about their loss and
journey, and here I am, snuggled in bed with my pillows and blankets in double
portions, reading it over social media with the immediate choice whether or not
to click on the like button to virtually send my sympathy. I felt terrible. It
has been 12 hours since the time I read their experiences but I am still
haunted by the sheer agony seeping in from their stories of grief. I picked up
my Bible and thumbed through the pages and went to <i>Luke 21</i> – when Jesus explained to his disciples the signs of the
end of times.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I wasn’t exactly surprised by
what has been happening all over the world. Typhoons, earthquakes, economic
crises, and wars. They weren’t foreign to me at all, having lived in the ring
of fire for the whole of my life. Although I had anticipated them, I also wasn’t
exactly prepared for them. For such ugliness. For such grief. And instead of
people calling out to God, more and more of them are blaspheming Him, blaming
Him, or chucking out the entire idea of Him, even though some of them are being
very polite about it. It was actually worse than what I have pictured.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
When I was a lot younger, I never
really expected having to run through certain arguments over the Bible I
haven’t thought of before. Or if there were thoughts I <i>have </i>thought about, I have never really bothered to actually
acknowledge them as worthy to be stressed over. But, I soon started to realize,
in comparison to our assumptions, people actually have much deeper issues about
God, which roots down from their individual experiences on spirituality,
traditions, and religion. Some accept the gospel like a sponge, but some just
aren’t like that. That’s reality. But why are we going to stop witnessing to
these people just because they demand more reason?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
One night, I found myself talking
with a friend about the Bible and the gospel. It turns out smart people have a
way of running an argument. We weren’t exactly arguing, but he did have
questions about the Bible and its validity, which although I had anticipated, I
wasn’t exactly perfectly in knowledge of. I mean, I’m not the smartest
Christian out there (not that it’s a shock to any of you) and I do not
understand every interpretation of the Scripture (surprise, surprise), nor do I
know all the facts about the discovery of the manuscripts of the gospels and
epistles, so I could not flaunt the vast knowledge of the logic behind the
Bible that I do not really have. But, I did remember the Lord sending Moses and
Jeremiah who were slow in speech and of filthy lips, and they didn’t have to do
anything but to <i>be of good faith</i> and <i>go</i>. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Jesus Christ has reminded us in <i>Luke 21</i> that these things are a part of
the signs of the end of times. We could be brought to kings or governors (or, perhaps
the smartest/most influential people we will ever meet in our life), and they
will question our belief. Criticize it. Ridicule it. Discredit it. That will
happen, if it hasn’t, yet. They will give us a rundown of all the <i>logical</i> reasons why we should abandon
our belief, but Jesus Christ reminded us to be firm, saying, “<span style="color: #4c1130;"><b><i>…make
up your mind not to worry beforehand how you will defend yourselves. For I will
give you words and wisdom that none of your adversaries will be able to resist
or contradict.</i></b>” (<b><i>Luke 21:14-15, NIV</i></b>)</span> Now, I could not
really picture how amazing that sounds like, but if He talks about wisdom that
not even the person against it could contradict or resist, that is one promise
I’d gladly cling on to. <i>That </i>is
perfect wisdom.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
It’s so wonderful how God could
use His power on regular people like us to proclaim His good news to the world,
or how He could crush every seemingly perfect human logic by His wisdom. I
wrote a separate post about it <b><i><a href="http://mutedrhapsodies.blogspot.com/2013/11/devotional-friday-true-wisdom-and-mind.html" target="_blank">here</a></i></b><i> </i>a few years back.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">“By standing firm you will gain life.”<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Luke 21:19, </span><i><span style="color: #4c1130;">NIV</span><o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Above all else, he only needs us
to be still.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Too often we see people negating
God and His kingdom in skepticism because of what is happening to the world.
Too often we hear the same questions, “<i>Why
does a loving God allow this to happen?</i>” “<i>Is there redemption for us at all?</i>” “<i>Why care about what’s after death when we only have one life to live?
YOLO, right?</i>” Is this not the time to step up and be bold for the Lord that
we serve? Is this not the time to boast about God’s love instead of tucking it
in our prayer closet? Is this not the time to stop being kept to ourselves in
church meeting the same set of faces every Sunday? Do we not realize that the
more we keep ourselves all comfortable in our barracks with a war outside, the
more people would see in us, only streaks of hypocrisy?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
The world is weeping for Someone
they do not know. The world is grasping for something they have not yet felt.
The world is seeing its own destruction and is not sure why. Is it not too selfish
to hog the joy that they do not have yet? Is it not too hypocritical to keep
the love we said was eternal and free? Do we even feel the earth at all?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-62487963890284798552015-09-07T15:05:00.000+08:002015-09-30T12:39:16.530+08:00Learning Teaching: Kiddie Wisdom<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I know I would not remain with
this privilege forever, that is why I decided to, along with my <i>Law School Reflections</i> series, write a
separate series I decided to plainly call “<i>Learning
Teaching</i>” – a term I have often used in our undergraduate studies. Unlike
my <i>Law School Reflections </i>series,
this most definitely wouldn’t last around five years. This is why I am making
it a point to congest everything in a single post, and I hope you wouldn’t
mind. I suppose there is just so much to take in when you are within and taken
in a child’s world; in fact, I am starting to think I am learning far more from
the kids than they are, from me. I want to share these joys with you. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzw7kGGTpOONJBDwXuOHb54icuqHx8S7_qAtsaUkZumdExbApBp2-dRZuDLTAFLUew6_gHLr-Qc3-cYKEv5iVFhlhav1nZlp2pp-RMBHvj8MTytd69iEEHbmkdeziDVt5HwnDYqENDew/s1600/every-child-is-a-different-kind-of-flower-and-all-together-children-quote.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzw7kGGTpOONJBDwXuOHb54icuqHx8S7_qAtsaUkZumdExbApBp2-dRZuDLTAFLUew6_gHLr-Qc3-cYKEv5iVFhlhav1nZlp2pp-RMBHvj8MTytd69iEEHbmkdeziDVt5HwnDYqENDew/s1600/every-child-is-a-different-kind-of-flower-and-all-together-children-quote.jpg" /></a></div>
Yesterday, as I was dismissing
the class with a prayer, I noticed how Zaza and Jaden insisted on kneeling with
their heads bowed down. I paused momentarily before having a short flashback of
events. During the first month of supervising the kids, I have noticed how,
during flag ceremony prayers, Jaden always squats down and I, stepping in and
believing his actions are purely out of naughtiness, <i>consistently
</i>tap his elbow with a whisper, “<i>No</i>,
Jaden. You stand up.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I was brought back to the present
time with a tug from both kids. “See, teacher? Zaza and I bowed down to pray.”
I smiled, suddenly feeling ashamed of my ignorance. Was it because I was too
accustomed to the ways of <i>now</i> – no
longer realizing the expression of reverence <i>even </i>just by bending my knees in public? I cringe, remembering how
similar my judgment and actions were with the disciples’ when they had tried to
keep the children from getting near Christ.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
“Jaden, why are you always
smiling?” I asked, suddenly in the mood to start a random chat after a few
seconds of staring at his grinning face. I have always found him adorable and I
couldn’t help not enjoying his cuteness once in a while.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
He lifted his head and waved his
twistable crayons in front of his face and said, “Because I’m happy. Because
God loves me.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I was taken aback by his response
as if I didn’t know how much the Lord’s love can do to a person. I shouldn’t be
surprised, having been a Christian for quite a while now, but I was actually humbled
by how a five-year-old could remind me of such a striking truth that we, adults
and young adults, have so-often forgotten. Was the simple understanding of God’s
love for us enough to paste a smile on our face for a day? I suppose all we
have to do to confirm it, is to ask a child. I shook my head in disbelief at my
own callousness.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
There is so much I have realized,
working around children for a few months, and they have always brought me back
to diminishing the complexity in life. Life is beautiful, and they have allowed
me to allow the beauty to show itself even in the simplest manner – like a
stroke in the hair, a kiss on the cheek, a little “I love you, Teacher Aine,”
or a bear hug. Beautiful. Pure. And I would never wonder why Jesus Christ preferred faith and praises like theirs. It took me a
privilege of serving them to understand.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I have always been told that this
job is an opportunity to minister to the children. It’s funny how most of the
time, I felt like it was the other way around.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-92195109065225416202015-08-17T16:40:00.000+08:002015-09-30T12:44:28.392+08:00Law School Reflections: The Beginning<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2JUwDIEfrrKrajBdFspxubeVHszfMuCQlnHLgyabBr0IXT9-eNnt1_CucrBwpa5s5gcRukmwVq1B7R8T0HKKfhVMofKc7ALe95nWbATb6TStCIQ9uofNV5chcKM1ftOTwoKDwo9edDw/s1600/LSR2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2JUwDIEfrrKrajBdFspxubeVHszfMuCQlnHLgyabBr0IXT9-eNnt1_CucrBwpa5s5gcRukmwVq1B7R8T0HKKfhVMofKc7ALe95nWbATb6TStCIQ9uofNV5chcKM1ftOTwoKDwo9edDw/s1600/LSR2.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Very too often we find ourselves
caught up with unnecessary complications, standing between cross roads,
wondering why we were even there. What exactly is the point of this all, we ask
in between work, before getting that same silence hanging on the air as if we
didn’t ask loud enough. And then we go back to our rushed lives, doing this, or
doing that, almost finally accepting this is everything there will ever be in
our static life. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
This series of posts I am
planning on starting (<i>Law School Reflections</i>)
is actually something I am doing on impulse. Last night, as I was doing
advanced reading, I came across the Roman Law section and Gaius, a Roman jurist
who asserted how important it was to associate the political history of a
people with its laws, and said, “<b><i>I perceive a thing is complete only when all
parts are assembled, and surely the most important part of a thing is its
beginning.</i></b><i>”</i> I stopped and
thought about it for a while before allowing a smile to spread across my face,
remembering how, just last Saturday during the Law School Testimonial Dinner
and Acquaintance Party, I realized how close to life law really is, after all.
I picked up my marker and wrote what he said on the white board on my bedroom
wall.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Gaius was right. How do we even
see our lives in a complete picture without even going back to the beginning?
Or, how do we pick up all the pieces without starting somewhere?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
John 1:1-5 speaks of Jesus Christ
as the beginning. <span style="color: #4c1130;">“<i>In the beginning was
the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the
beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing
was made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. And
the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.</i> (<i>NKJV</i>)”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
How are we to deny the essence of
our existence if we fail to establish within ourselves, our beginning? And how
do we know where we ought to go without knowing (or remembering, for those who
already knew) where everything, including us, began?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
This post is not where I am to
prove the validity of God’s Word or if Christ really is the Messiah. I am
writing this under the assumption that you are reading this because you are a
professing Christian, set to follow Jesus Christ with your whole heart. Now,
where is our beginning, and how does it tell us where we ought to go?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
When we realize and remember that
Jesus Christ is our beginning, all our actions would point back to it, just
like how an effect points back to its cause. When we get lost in the tangle of
life’s threads, – work, studies, and ministry – always remember that our own
string starts somewhere and that is with Jesus. Know that our life should be
anchored to our Lord and we ought to go back daily, tugging on the line to make
sure we’re still in place, and remember that the source of all these is He who has
pursued us first. And unless we do that, and unless we rid of all the noise
just to get back to the starting point, our lives would be as pointless as a tree
without its root.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
When Gaius said that the most
important in assembling the parts to make us complete is the beginning, I agree
with him. And that Beginning is urging us, amidst toiling and busy schedules,
to go back and see that there is more to Him than just being the starting point
of everything. Are we not set to strip off life's complications and see ourselves assembling to completion by fixing our eyes on the Beginning, who also happens to be the End?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><span style="color: #4c1130;"><br /></span></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">“My
beloved spoke and said to me: ‘Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.”</span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #4c1130;"><b>Song
of Solomon 2:10</b><b><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">"'I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End,' says the Lord, "who is, and who was, and who is to come, the Almighty.'"</span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Revelation 1:8</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6125550918386934674.post-81816932003352841542015-08-01T19:56:00.001+08:002015-08-01T21:47:15.422+08:00Life. Death. The In-Betweens. <div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I let my thoughts take a sharp
turn as I stare at the picture of this dead man I barely knew, while his wife,
still alive, retells how things had gone last Sunday night – the night her
husband left her.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
It has been common knowledge that
this old woman had been my grandmother’s close friend, but I had no idea that
all these years that I knew her, she had a bedridden husband. Not until
tonight. I stare at his blow-up photo a little bit longer and I wonder how he
must’ve looked like, alive. Or how he must’ve been as a husband, sans his last
few years of paralysis. Or how they spent their time together as young lovers.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I couldn’t think straight and
singularly, as with a normal thinker could – one thought at a time. It was
always several self-conversations at the same time.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
Maybe it is because the second
cup of coffee I just had an hour ago is starting to charge me up with more
caffeine than I usually need. Or maybe, I am just too distracted by the
grammatically incorrect message on the ribbon strapped around the flowers.
Either way, I shouldn’t care which is true. Neither would change my attitude
towards that moment. Besides, I feel a headache coming. Somebody makes a round
to offer a bowl of greaseless peanuts. I hesitate, but dig my fingers into it
to scoop a handful.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
My eyes eventually resort to
wandering all over the tiny room, darting from one sad bulb of flower to the
next, as Pastor Nemuel’s exhortation on True Rest drones into my ear. The tiny
holes on the metal seats in front of me are making me dizzy, I blink a few more
times to rid of the headache building up, and I start to delve into obscure
universal truths about life. Death. Some more life.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
My thoughts get put on hold for a
moment by the mere mention of more deaths. My mom and my boss initiate
the small talk on today’s breaking news, according to social media – children <i>poisoned </i>after the nation-wide
deworming. The funny feeling in my stomach begins crawling upward again. To my
chest. To my throat, gagging me. If they truly have died, I think about how the
children are not aware of the commotion they are causing back here in the land
of the <i>living</i>. Images of limp,
lifeless little bodies flash in my mind and I think about the end times, and
this, probably being a part of the signs.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I am showing signs of mentally
freaking out myself, but today I make sure to confirm with official news from
official journalists, lest I fall into the <i>gullible
citizen</i> category again. Three hundred children all over Western to Northern
Mindanao are directly affected, as rumored, but nobody died after all, and it
was, according to the Department of Health, only a side effect of taking the
deworming pills when having worms more than an average child’s. My mother and I
breathe a mental sigh of relief, and, mentally, knocking ourselves in the head
for being paranoid<i> </i>for a moment. But
in-between seconds, I still wonder how much of the truth they are covering up
this time, and if this kind of truth could raise the dead, if there were any.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
I go back to my thoughts; my eyes
return to the picture of the grinning, toothless old man, against an edited sky
background, as if assuring us, “I’m alright now. I’m resting.” I wonder if I’d
look the same on a picture frame like that, when I’d have my turn.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
It’s funny how living on earth is
more of a pain than what comes after death in Christ. I think about the living
mourning for their dead. Perhaps death<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>*</b></span> is more of life than life itself after
all. I shake my head, smile, and look around, taking note of the faces. Perhaps
it truly is.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b><br /></b></span>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<i><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>*the kind of death one reaches
while in Christ.</b></span></i></div>
Katherine Codashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04360229490890895426noreply@blogger.com1